Some people believe that there's always some one or something that should be blamed for world miseries.

The non-profits and social sector are rife with criticisms of the capitalist economy and government. Yet, they have to work hand-in-hand with the two.

For the conspiracy theorists, there is a global network of villains and ego-maniacal entities, ala the James Bond villains that are planning, hatching their next global destruction ventures.

For the poor and illiterate, it's the rich and ultra-wealthy that are sucking all the resources that they need to survive. And the corrupt government that's feeding this greedy landed gentry.

For the owners, it's the labor unions and their goons and strategies that keep the business from thriving and the government's bribery schemes wrapped up neatly in certain fees for here and there.

For the middle-class tired of pretending that they are more well-off, abhors the poor for creating the conditions of pallor, dirt, and insecurity in many communities. These people are considered lazy, worthless, and can't be saved.

The big business are blaming the environmentalists and climate-change crazies for wrecking their plans and making it harder to conduct business. The auditors are blaming the government for lax regulations. The consumers are blaming the government for run-away inflation for which the energy producers are caught in the quagmire. The masses are suffering and that the world is coming to an end unless climate change is addressed.

The elite, educated ones are blaming the fringe sectors and the fringe sectors are blaming the elite, educated majority. 

Do you see where this is going? 

You want an honest feedback so that you can improve your work.

The first group will tell you what you want to hear, all the good things sans the not-so-good ones for fear of discouraging you.

The second group will tell you all the worst things that you have done and how it negatively impacted them. Fine, if that is the truth.

Yet, we live with this two polar opposites all the time without the real benefit of honest constructive feedback, in our workplace, in organizations, and sometimes in our own families.

It cannot be that worst but it can't be that too great either. For improvement's sake, it is better to be honest than to be lying about someone's performance. However, how you deliver this is very critical to the outcome you're seeking. 

What does it take to create an atmosphere where honest feedback is taken and given constructively?

• Trust and non-judgement approach
• Purpose-driven conversation aimed at improvement
• Provide detailed examples and detailed suggestions for improvement
• Thank and encourage the person for recognizing the need to change for the better
• Offer support to sustain these changes (if you were able to)
• Offer praise and encouragement when the person is exhibiting efforts to sustain these changes

For some situations, you will never know where you actually sit, having two of these polar opposites received from different quarters. Perhaps, the truth is somewhere in the middle.  It is up to you to weigh both things. What matters is that you're improving everyday while others are busy taking successful people down. 

Not my business.

A colleague once sent me a question regarding another coalition in Ottawa, not my business to comment on what is that coalition actually trying to do.

Another said that I should be sending my books to key people that helped me get to where I am now, not my business to remind them that I exist and I existed before within their peripheral vision.

Another friend said that I should try to be involved in a service club because they meet regularly. They meet regularly to do nothing. Every club I have spoken to wanted me badly. Not my thing.

A family member said that I should be aware of what's going on in North Korea and the nuclear stand-off with the US, not my business. I knew what's going on in North Korea, including its history, Korean War. I have a Masters Degree in International Relations. I care enough to know but I don't get too emotional about it. 

We need to safeguard our focus and attention.

We need to protect ourselves from intrusions and incursions of others into our territorial waters.

We create our own waves.